Let’s Talk About… Something Else
I was in Newberg, Oregon for a big chunk of December and January. I went up to be with my big sister before and after the death of her husband of 58 years, a dear man I’ve known my entire life. She’s 16 years older than me and they were dating when I was a just puppy, so I mean my entire life literally. But this isn’t really about that. So many people in our community have lost loved ones. I’m not alone or special in the grief I feel. If we didn’t love our people so deeply, we wouldn’t grieve their loss so deeply. It’s the cost of the ticket and it hurts like crazy.
With his death my focus shifted. Things that used to matter to me don’t anymore. Things that didn’t matter so much now do. I’ve decided to be intentional in where I place my attention focusing on what’s beautiful and good in the world—not just amazing sunsets and wildlife, but all the times when people just show up for each other.
I used to give my writing students an assignment I called, Somebody Did Me A Solid. I’d ask them to think of a time when someone unexpectedly stepped up and provided something they needed, be it a kind word or some cash money. Everybody has that story.
During the cold snap and ice storm, I was still in Newberg while Ben was here in Manzanita. We only have the one car and when even triple A couldn’t get her started, a good friend came and picked me up, delivering me to my sister’s in time for her birthday—that’s a solid, for sure. When the temperatures dropped and the power went out a few days later, neighbors offered their RV for Ben to sleep in on the coldest night, so he’d be warm. The next day power was restored to everyone on our street except our house because of a downed tree on 3rd. Neighbors offered us room in their fridges and freezers, so we didn’t lose any food. I even saw an invitation to a power outage potluck that a friend in town wanted to host.
Ben did his Ben thing—he checked on the homes of our out of town neighbors to make sure pipes weren’t frozen. He told me how City and County workers were out in force in the cold and ice taking care of business as quick as possible in ugly and dangerous conditions. Look for the helpers, Fred Rogers used to say and man, do we have helpers in our community.
I know all this wasn’t particular to us or to our street.
Back in Newberg on a Sunday night, my sister and I watched an old episode of Grants Getaways on KGW that featured the Smiley Brothers & Sisters Salmon Harvest which harvests, cans, and distributes hatchery coho salmon to the North County Food Bank with the help of a whole bunch of volunteers. After the show was over, my sister asked about our community and I told her about some of the other things we do for each other; like the community garden at the Land Trust which provides hundreds of pounds of produce to low income folks in the villages, and events that are just plain fun like the Christmas tree lighting at Underhill Plaza, the Fourth of July parade, the community theater at NCRD, Pie Day, the apple festival at White Clover Grange, the Polar Plunge. And some of the small individual things people have done like the sewing circle that met every Monday evening for years at my neighbor Bobbie’s home and the outdoor movies and music Kelly Roy hosted this summer on the Dirty Bird lot.
Good people with good ideas making a difference in the lives of others and having fun doing it. Doing a solid for the place and the people in our community. A friend who’s lived here since the 70’s told me people see the possibility to create something here and they make it happen.
That’s how CartM started and that’s how the Heart of CartM continues.
Annie Dillard writes, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. What we do with this hour, and that one, is what we are doing.”
Amen, Annie. Amen.
Kim Rosenberg loretta.kim.rosenberg@gmail.com